The Real World St. Thomas, Episode 10 - "Of Vice And Men"

Apparently, dudes that your friends never really found attractive are off limits.

Gallery Girls, Episode 3 - 'Wild Child"

Amy is "from a good family", which means she can hang out around the toilets and not feel weird about it.

The Real World St. Thomas, Episode 9 - "Who Done It"

Is true love enough to kill for?

Gallery Girls Episode 2 - "What Goes On"

Brooklyn boys smell bad and throw stuff.

The Real World St. Thomas Episode 8 - "Hurts So Good"

Robb thinks this is a person worth burning yourself with a cigarette over.

The Real World St. Thomas, Episode 7 - "No Shirt, Boat Shoes, No Sanity"

Who needs dignity when a guy in a children's pirate hat notices you sometimes?

Bachelor Pad Season 3 - Episode 3

If Ed left, nobody else would ever be drunk enough to make out with Jaclyn.

The Real World St. Thomas, Episode 6 - "Smells Like Green Spirits"

Trey is the epitome of island style. 

Bachelor Pad, Season 3 - Episode 2

Jamie would like to switch partners, because her current partner is a lame 32-year-old virgin who can't drive.

The Real World St. Thomas Episode 5 - "Clean Break"

Alyssa makes Brandon feel like a natural woman.

Bachelor Pad Season 3 - Episode 1

The Wild n' Crazy Guy routine gets old fast.

The Bachelorette, Emily Maynard - Finale & After The Final Rose

Jef will finally earn that second F with Emily.

The Real World St. Thomas, Episode 4 - "To Pee Or Not To Pee"

Who needs feet when you look this good?

The Real World St. Thomas, Episode 3 - "Roommates Become Bedmates"

What's grosser - the girl who pops a dude's back pimples, or the guy who sits and watches?

Dance Moms Episode 6 - "How Do You Like Them Apples?"

If you fail in Ohio, you'll fail anywhere.

The Bachelorette, Emily Maynard - Episode 9 Fantasy Dates

Now Sean can return to tending to the bodies in his backyard.

Real World: St. Thomas, Episode 2 - "99 Problems But The Beach Ain't One"

I get  a small penis vibe from Brando.

The Bachelorette, Emily Maynard - Episode 8 Hometown Dates

Emily meets Sean's gay dad.

The Bachelorette, Emily Maynard - Episode 7

Dance Moms Episode 3 - "I Know What You Did Last Competition"

Do the Helen Keller, and talk with your hips.