![]() |
Mmmm... tastes like vodka and juvie. photo MTV.com |
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Reality News
You know what's real suffering? Living in Staten Island, period.
The suffering behind 'Mob Wives' glitz
The next Kenny? Nah, not hot enough.
Real World Bad Boy Adam Royer Seeks Redemption on MTV Spin-Off
It rhymes with Samage Pontrol.
'Real Housewives of Beverly Hills': Why's Camille Grammer holding back in S2?
If you're disappointed, you hate Amurka.
Tom Hanks disappointed with American Idol
The suffering behind 'Mob Wives' glitz
The next Kenny? Nah, not hot enough.
Real World Bad Boy Adam Royer Seeks Redemption on MTV Spin-Off
It rhymes with Samage Pontrol.
'Real Housewives of Beverly Hills': Why's Camille Grammer holding back in S2?
If you're disappointed, you hate Amurka.
Tom Hanks disappointed with American Idol
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Reality News
Dating = breaking each other's glasses and saying "I'm done" alot.
Are Sammi and Ronnie Dating Again?
Arnold's maid to get a cameo.
Rachel Uchitel gets her own reality show
John Travolta destroys everything in his wake.
Sonja Morgan: On the Hook for $7 Million!
Shockingly, she's not referring to the size of her lips.
Real Housewife Taylor Armstrong: "I Went Too Far"
Are Sammi and Ronnie Dating Again?
Arnold's maid to get a cameo.
Rachel Uchitel gets her own reality show
John Travolta destroys everything in his wake.
Sonja Morgan: On the Hook for $7 Million!
Shockingly, she's not referring to the size of her lips.
Real Housewife Taylor Armstrong: "I Went Too Far"
Monday, May 23, 2011
Friday, May 20, 2011
Reality News
Verbal contract? Jon's been giving verbal contracts all over town. Or whatever.
Kate Gosselin ordered to pay marriage counselor $10,000
Love slutty dresses, having lesbian sexual experiences for the male gaze, and mint juleps?
Want to be a reality TV star? Casting call Saturday in Louisville
Looks like the renovation of her green eighties bathroom will have to wait.
Danielle Staub Sued for $375,000 After Nabbing $25,000 For Striptease
This headline not-so-subtly calls Bethenny ugly.
Brains Beat Beauty: Bethenny Frankel Outranks J. Lo on Forbes List
Kate Gosselin ordered to pay marriage counselor $10,000
Love slutty dresses, having lesbian sexual experiences for the male gaze, and mint juleps?
Want to be a reality TV star? Casting call Saturday in Louisville
Looks like the renovation of her green eighties bathroom will have to wait.
Danielle Staub Sued for $375,000 After Nabbing $25,000 For Striptease
This headline not-so-subtly calls Bethenny ugly.
Brains Beat Beauty: Bethenny Frankel Outranks J. Lo on Forbes List
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Reality News
Renee Graziano has a fan? And it's 50 Cent? What's next, flying pigs or another idiom of improbability?
50 Cent Wants Floyd Mayweather to Teach Mob Wife
Work it, girl. Get back in that H-list limelight.
Danielle Staub: I have addictions and need professional help
Depends on who has cooler nannies...
Kelsey Grammer Battles Ex-Wife Camille for Sole Custody?
"You're my sister-in-law! You're my sister-in-law!"
Teresa Giudice Had 'No Idea' Her Sister-in-Law Was Joining 'Housewives' Cast
Any relation to Dan Cortese? No? Jump away, then.
'Jersey Shore' cast member Deena Cortese nearly falls off a bridge
50 Cent Wants Floyd Mayweather to Teach Mob Wife
Work it, girl. Get back in that H-list limelight.
Danielle Staub: I have addictions and need professional help
Depends on who has cooler nannies...
Kelsey Grammer Battles Ex-Wife Camille for Sole Custody?
"You're my sister-in-law! You're my sister-in-law!"
Teresa Giudice Had 'No Idea' Her Sister-in-Law Was Joining 'Housewives' Cast
Any relation to Dan Cortese? No? Jump away, then.
'Jersey Shore' cast member Deena Cortese nearly falls off a bridge
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Friday, May 13, 2011
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Reality News
What about her "Poor Choice in Selecting a Life Mate" disorder?
'Housewife' Alexis Bellino Reveals Eating Disorder
Pay $25 to look at someone who's married to someone who's in jail for bank robbery from afar.
Dan Gross: 'Mob Wife' to host S. Philly party
I think that ship has sailed, what with the Leno chin implant.
Kim Kardashian Gives Bristol Palin Reality TV Advice: ‘Be Authentic!’
Frank Sorrentino and Audrina's mom can have drunken reality parent sex.
The Situation’s dad wants a reality show. Of course!
'Housewife' Alexis Bellino Reveals Eating Disorder
Pay $25 to look at someone who's married to someone who's in jail for bank robbery from afar.
Dan Gross: 'Mob Wife' to host S. Philly party
I think that ship has sailed, what with the Leno chin implant.
Kim Kardashian Gives Bristol Palin Reality TV Advice: ‘Be Authentic!’
Frank Sorrentino and Audrina's mom can have drunken reality parent sex.
The Situation’s dad wants a reality show. Of course!
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Reality News
Heidi gets in line for Dancing with the Stars, right after Dennis Cavallari and the guy who cleans up broken glass at the Bad Girls Club house.
Heidi Montag Enjoying 'Retirement,' Would Come Back for 'DWTS'
That children's song about being fat was his undoing.
'The Biggest Loser: Couples' cuts Austin Andrews, determines final four
If Russell doesn't appreciate those DSLs, somebody out there will.
Taylor Armstrong Splits from Husband
Jo De Lo Rosa dodged a broke-ass bullet.
Real Housewives Of Orange County's Slade Smiley Still Jobless And $130k In Debt
Who needs a house when you have giant fake breastsises? There's room for three beds and an end table.
Real Housewife Peggy Tanous Fights to Keep her Home
Heidi Montag Enjoying 'Retirement,' Would Come Back for 'DWTS'
That children's song about being fat was his undoing.
'The Biggest Loser: Couples' cuts Austin Andrews, determines final four
If Russell doesn't appreciate those DSLs, somebody out there will.
Taylor Armstrong Splits from Husband
Jo De Lo Rosa dodged a broke-ass bullet.
Real Housewives Of Orange County's Slade Smiley Still Jobless And $130k In Debt
Who needs a house when you have giant fake breastsises? There's room for three beds and an end table.
Real Housewife Peggy Tanous Fights to Keep her Home
Monday, May 9, 2011
Reality News
Hoping Jake Pavelka will make a similar pledge.
Kate Gosselin would "never" return to 'DWTS'
This whole "pretend you preside over a respectable country" thing is starting to work.
'Jersey Shore' Production Delayed by Italian President
Congratulations, person who almost killed someone once.
Nick Hogan's Getting Engaged
Same shit, different toilet.
Oxygen Media Reveals New Cast of "Bad Girls Club: New Orleans"
Kate Gosselin would "never" return to 'DWTS'
This whole "pretend you preside over a respectable country" thing is starting to work.
'Jersey Shore' Production Delayed by Italian President
Congratulations, person who almost killed someone once.
Nick Hogan's Getting Engaged
Same shit, different toilet.
Oxygen Media Reveals New Cast of "Bad Girls Club: New Orleans"
Friday, May 6, 2011
Reality News
Yes. Let us eat KFC, you asshole.
Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution: Pulled; Should ABC Have Cancelled the Series?
Amber learns her lesson - next time, punch Gary in the head after the cameramen go home for the day.
Teen Mom's Amber Portwood in Tears After Ordered to Stand Trial for Baby Daddy Beatdown
He's forgotten all aboot what happened to Jillian Harris, eh?
Lone Canadian to star in The Bachelorette
The best news in Rhode Island since a mediocre DJ left for a summer at The Shore...
R.I. News Digest: Richard Hatch denied bail, held in N.Y
Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution: Pulled; Should ABC Have Cancelled the Series?
Amber learns her lesson - next time, punch Gary in the head after the cameramen go home for the day.
Teen Mom's Amber Portwood in Tears After Ordered to Stand Trial for Baby Daddy Beatdown
He's forgotten all aboot what happened to Jillian Harris, eh?
Lone Canadian to star in The Bachelorette
The best news in Rhode Island since a mediocre DJ left for a summer at The Shore...
R.I. News Digest: Richard Hatch denied bail, held in N.Y
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Reality News
You can almost see the baby wishing death upon itself from within the womb.
'Real Housewife" Kim Zolciak posts pregnancy photo
Oh, you think you're better than Heidi Montag? Trista Rehn will cut you.
Kristin Cavallari's Wedding Won't Be Televised? But She's a Reality TV Star!
It rhymes with "Pale Fattention"
Real World's Heather: Why I Hooked Up With My Female Roommate
Jordan Catalano dishes about Good Ol' Muffin Top.
30 Seconds To Mars 'Very Grateful' James Durbin Covered Them On 'Idol'
'Real Housewife" Kim Zolciak posts pregnancy photo
Oh, you think you're better than Heidi Montag? Trista Rehn will cut you.
Kristin Cavallari's Wedding Won't Be Televised? But She's a Reality TV Star!
It rhymes with "Pale Fattention"
Real World's Heather: Why I Hooked Up With My Female Roommate
Jordan Catalano dishes about Good Ol' Muffin Top.
30 Seconds To Mars 'Very Grateful' James Durbin Covered Them On 'Idol'
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Reality News
The work atmosphere at Sears Hardware or wherever else they wear those red shirts and khaki pants is about to get awkward...
Did 'Teen Mom' Kailyn and Boyfriend Jordan Break Up?
Adriana calls them "matronly", which I'm guessing means they refuse to take private pole dancing lessons on camera.
Housewives vs. Housewives: Miami Star Disses New York Cast
Somebody call PETA. A horse died today, because John Rich will not allow NeNe Leakes to ride a cowboy.
John Rich Questions Intentions of 'Apprentice' Ladies
So they fly to Las Vegas? The Las Vegas? That's uncharted reality show territory!
ABC reveals additional details about Ashley Hebert's The Bachelorette
Did 'Teen Mom' Kailyn and Boyfriend Jordan Break Up?
Adriana calls them "matronly", which I'm guessing means they refuse to take private pole dancing lessons on camera.
Housewives vs. Housewives: Miami Star Disses New York Cast
Somebody call PETA. A horse died today, because John Rich will not allow NeNe Leakes to ride a cowboy.
John Rich Questions Intentions of 'Apprentice' Ladies
So they fly to Las Vegas? The Las Vegas? That's uncharted reality show territory!
ABC reveals additional details about Ashley Hebert's The Bachelorette
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Reality News
Justin Bobby wins third-tier Hollywood poon through an active regimen of not showering.
Holly Montag Dating Audrina Patridge's Former Flame
Breaking News - Toddler Trips on Sidewalk.
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills: Kyle Richards Rushes to Her Daughters Aid (Photos)
She's in it for the daily stool analysis.
Former 'Bachelor' Travis Stork proposes to girlfriend Charlotte Brown
Whatever you say, person who was on a low-rated Oxygen show three years ago.
Natalie Nunn Says Amber Rose Is Broke, Calls Fabolous A 'Male Groupie'
Maks curses the day Twitter was invented.
Kirstie Alley explains 'Dancing With The Stars' kiss was for Twitter fans
Holly Montag Dating Audrina Patridge's Former Flame
Breaking News - Toddler Trips on Sidewalk.
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills: Kyle Richards Rushes to Her Daughters Aid (Photos)
She's in it for the daily stool analysis.
Former 'Bachelor' Travis Stork proposes to girlfriend Charlotte Brown
Whatever you say, person who was on a low-rated Oxygen show three years ago.
Natalie Nunn Says Amber Rose Is Broke, Calls Fabolous A 'Male Groupie'
Maks curses the day Twitter was invented.
Kirstie Alley explains 'Dancing With The Stars' kiss was for Twitter fans
Monday, May 2, 2011
Reality News
Her alcoholic and otherwise unreliable source of an ex-husband seems to think so.
Was Vicki Gunvalson of the 'Real Housewives' Franchise Pregnant When She Wed Donn?
Get in line, chubby standing-bass-player lovers.
Casey Abrams: Haley Reinhart and I aren't dating and never were
Yeah! Kill that stripper who was just doing her job!
Nothing Breaks the Ice Quite Like a Stripper Fight on 'Saddle Ranch'
Taking lessons from her son?
Renee Graziano Says Father Is Ignoring Her
Was Vicki Gunvalson of the 'Real Housewives' Franchise Pregnant When She Wed Donn?
Get in line, chubby standing-bass-player lovers.
Casey Abrams: Haley Reinhart and I aren't dating and never were
Yeah! Kill that stripper who was just doing her job!
Nothing Breaks the Ice Quite Like a Stripper Fight on 'Saddle Ranch'
Taking lessons from her son?
Renee Graziano Says Father Is Ignoring Her
Friday, April 29, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Reality News
And she's just as non-interesting as you imagined she'd be.
Interview With Hope Dworaczyk
Run, Kroy. Faster than when another player is chasing you, or whatever sports cliche is appropriate here. I don't know sports. Sorry.
Did Kim Zolciak’s NFL Beau Call Off the Wedding?
Time to expand the double wide.
'Teen Mom' Leah Messer pregnant again?
Oh, so now having ass sex with another man on camera is "gay porn?" Pssssh...
The Real World's Dustin Zito on His Gay Porn Past
Interview With Hope Dworaczyk
Run, Kroy. Faster than when another player is chasing you, or whatever sports cliche is appropriate here. I don't know sports. Sorry.
Did Kim Zolciak’s NFL Beau Call Off the Wedding?
Time to expand the double wide.
'Teen Mom' Leah Messer pregnant again?
Oh, so now having ass sex with another man on camera is "gay porn?" Pssssh...
The Real World's Dustin Zito on His Gay Porn Past
The Real World Las Vegas Episode 8 - "Dustin Shows His Hand, Heather Folds"
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Reality News
She's also in denial about being good at runway-walking. **pump it pump it pump it**
'Housewives' Star Peggy Tanous: "I Was In Denial" About Postpartum Depression
You snooze, you lose, Stephen Colletti.
Jay Cutler, Kristin Cavallari Prepping Wedding
Then he must be dead. That's the only answer.
'The Bachelor': Emily Maynard Back on Twitter But No Brad Womack
It's a tragedy when a family that only exists because of one night of humping in an '89 Chevy Caprice breaks up.
Teen Mom Leah Messer moves out of her and Corey's house
'Housewives' Star Peggy Tanous: "I Was In Denial" About Postpartum Depression
You snooze, you lose, Stephen Colletti.
Jay Cutler, Kristin Cavallari Prepping Wedding
Then he must be dead. That's the only answer.
'The Bachelor': Emily Maynard Back on Twitter But No Brad Womack
It's a tragedy when a family that only exists because of one night of humping in an '89 Chevy Caprice breaks up.
Teen Mom Leah Messer moves out of her and Corey's house
Monday, April 25, 2011
Reality News
He's up for Husband of the Year, as long as he gets his f*ckin' half-dozen pears
Drita D'Avanzo's husband Lee D'Avanzo is in jail for bank robbery
Some men have a penchant for old lady ass crack.
Michael Lohan Dating 'Real Housewife' Kim Granatell
"Star" is Placentia-ese for "Drunk."
Audrina Patridge 'not surprised' mom is a star
Changing lives, one mechanical bull and watered-down Long Island at a time.
Exclusive Saddle Ranch Cast Interview W/ Robb Zbacnik, Rachel Lay & Cassie
Drita D'Avanzo's husband Lee D'Avanzo is in jail for bank robbery
Some men have a penchant for old lady ass crack.
Michael Lohan Dating 'Real Housewife' Kim Granatell
"Star" is Placentia-ese for "Drunk."
Audrina Patridge 'not surprised' mom is a star
Changing lives, one mechanical bull and watered-down Long Island at a time.
Exclusive Saddle Ranch Cast Interview W/ Robb Zbacnik, Rachel Lay & Cassie
Real Housewives of Orange County Episode 8 - "Kiss and Tell"
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Reality News
No, Vick-Tard, you caused the divorce by being on the show for six seasons.
'Real Housewife': The show caused my divorce
Ew, a skinny meatball? No thanks.
Snooki Lost A Lot of Weight, No Longer A Grenade
'Real Housewife': The show caused my divorce
Ew, a skinny meatball? No thanks.
Snooki Lost A Lot of Weight, No Longer A Grenade
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Reality News
You know what else is real? Poop. That doesn't mean I want to listen to it sing.
‘Real Housewives’ Star Simon van Kempen Competes with Rachel Black
What's shocking is that Gary Shirley has only had one girlfriend in his life. Bitches be picky.
Gary Shirley and Amber Portwood Break Up For Millionth Time
"Slob on my delicious shrimp and asparagus risotto."
Three 6 Mafia to Appear on VH1 Reality Show, 'Famous Food'
Whatever, dick. Maybe if you would have fed her dogs you'd still have a left arm.
Tom Lippolis: JWoww Freaking Stabbed Me!
‘Real Housewives’ Star Simon van Kempen Competes with Rachel Black
What's shocking is that Gary Shirley has only had one girlfriend in his life. Bitches be picky.
Gary Shirley and Amber Portwood Break Up For Millionth Time
"Slob on my delicious shrimp and asparagus risotto."
Three 6 Mafia to Appear on VH1 Reality Show, 'Famous Food'
Whatever, dick. Maybe if you would have fed her dogs you'd still have a left arm.
Tom Lippolis: JWoww Freaking Stabbed Me!
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
The Real World Las Vegas Episode 7 - "Cooke Monsters"
![]() |
"Cooke" cooks up some trouble. photo - mtv.com |
Reality News
Gretchen Christine Beaute goes to court-ay.
'Real Housewife' Gretchen Rossi Sued For Fraud
Guess we can all cancel Brokeback Mountain (or other gay sex movie) from our Netflix queue.
Manzo bros. to get more screentime during Season 3 of 'Housewives'
Oh, this took place in FLORIDA? You don't say.
Jennifer Del Rio, 16 and Pregnant Star, Accused of Slugging Baby Daddy Josh Smith
I'd have more to say about this, but I've already killed myself.
Are Brad Womack and Emily Maynard over?
'Real Housewife' Gretchen Rossi Sued For Fraud
Guess we can all cancel Brokeback Mountain (or other gay sex movie) from our Netflix queue.
Manzo bros. to get more screentime during Season 3 of 'Housewives'
Oh, this took place in FLORIDA? You don't say.
Jennifer Del Rio, 16 and Pregnant Star, Accused of Slugging Baby Daddy Josh Smith
I'd have more to say about this, but I've already killed myself.
Are Brad Womack and Emily Maynard over?
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Reality News
Jim Bellino stinks up Kourtney Kardashian's b-day with his bloaty-bloat stench.
Bellinos… What is Their ‘Creep’ Number?
Oh, it was an "accident", Roberto? Is that so?
Ali Fedotowsky has kayak accident and gets five staples in head
It's high time gays had the same opportunity to have sex in front of cameras so their grandmas will eventually see.
TV producers scout Boystown for reality show
Bellinos… What is Their ‘Creep’ Number?
Oh, it was an "accident", Roberto? Is that so?
Ali Fedotowsky has kayak accident and gets five staples in head
It's high time gays had the same opportunity to have sex in front of cameras so their grandmas will eventually see.
TV producers scout Boystown for reality show
Monday, April 18, 2011
Reality News
But she can't promise it won't happen again. Maybe even this week, if there's a sale on Dewar's at BevMo.
Audrina's Mom Apologizes for Her Filmed Drunken Rant on 'Audrina' Premiere
Kroy Jr. already wants out.
Kim Zolciak hosts classy baby shower
If the fur coat fits...
'Mob Wives' debuts, gets Staten Islanders talking about the Mafia stereotype portrayed
I can hear Barbara screaming from five states away.
"Teen Mom 2" Star Jenelle Evan's Sister Is Pregnant With Triplets
Audrina's Mom Apologizes for Her Filmed Drunken Rant on 'Audrina' Premiere
Kroy Jr. already wants out.
Kim Zolciak hosts classy baby shower
If the fur coat fits...
'Mob Wives' debuts, gets Staten Islanders talking about the Mafia stereotype portrayed
I can hear Barbara screaming from five states away.
"Teen Mom 2" Star Jenelle Evan's Sister Is Pregnant With Triplets
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Reality News
Pinched-nostril sounding "Clonk!"
Celebrity Apprentice Star NeNe Leakes Wants More Plastic Surgery
Pictures of fat slabs of dough always fly off the magazine racks.
Tareq Salahi in Playgirl
T-shirt with bullet holes tiiiiiiiime...
G Unit Records to Sign Jersey Shore’s DJ Pauly D
The kid from "Deliverance" tries out married life.
Is Teen Mom's Maci Bookout engaged to Kyle King?
Celebrity Apprentice Star NeNe Leakes Wants More Plastic Surgery
Pictures of fat slabs of dough always fly off the magazine racks.
Tareq Salahi in Playgirl
T-shirt with bullet holes tiiiiiiiime...
G Unit Records to Sign Jersey Shore’s DJ Pauly D
The kid from "Deliverance" tries out married life.
Is Teen Mom's Maci Bookout engaged to Kyle King?
Friday, April 15, 2011
Reality News
"Darl Goes to Jail." Like "Earnest Goes to Jail", but with more anal rape.
Butch From ‘Teen Mom’ Back Behind Bars….Again
Interestingly enough, the set is a basement in Van Nuys. Wear a condom, Jill.
Jill Zarin To Guest Star On ‘White Collar’ Butch From ‘Teen Mom’ Back Behind Bars….Again
Interestingly enough, the set is a basement in Van Nuys. Wear a condom, Jill.
She dodged a fire-crotched bullet on that one.
Audrina Patridge `dating Prince Harry`s friend`
As if The Olds needed more proof that Manhattan was "better in the 80s".
Kim Kardashian On Moving To NYC: My Boyfriend, Kris Humphries, Is Here & It’s A Natural Progression!
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Reality News
Who needs friends when you have a plastic surgeon?
'Real Housewife' Jill Zarin Debuts Dramatic New Look
I think he doth protest too much...
Ology Exclusive: Interview With Dustin Zito ('Real World Las Vegas') 'Real Housewife' Jill Zarin Debuts Dramatic New Look
I think he doth protest too much...
Add another name to the already full chore wheel...
Sister Wives' Kody and Robyn Brown expecting
Why are we worried about gays destroying the institution of marriage again?
"Teen Mom 2" star Leah Messer and Husband Corey Simms Divorcing
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
The Real World Las Vegas Episode 6 - "Sexiles/Exiles"
Reality News
Finally! A daytime talker for viewers who find "The Talk" too intellectually overreaching.
Ali Fedotowsky Lands View-Like Talk Show
If only Speidi would learn from their past mistakes...
Ali Fedotowsky Lands View-Like Talk Show
If only Speidi would learn from their past mistakes...
Whitney Port 'won't do show with boyfriend'
The cabs might be here, but the applause is noticeably absent.
Charlie Sheen Bombs in Boston Despite Pauly D. Joining Him Onstage
People who live in glass whorehouses shouldn't throw stones.
Girls Gone Wild's Joe Francis Calls Miami Housewives "Train Wrecks"
The cabs might be here, but the applause is noticeably absent.
Charlie Sheen Bombs in Boston Despite Pauly D. Joining Him Onstage
People who live in glass whorehouses shouldn't throw stones.
Girls Gone Wild's Joe Francis Calls Miami Housewives "Train Wrecks"
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Reality News
This show is going to get the shit watched out of it.
Heidi Montag, Jake Pavelka, Danielle Staub & Three 6 Mafia In The Kitchen
It's like a rectal exam being more popular than a pap smear.
It's like a rectal exam being more popular than a pap smear.
NY Housewife Jill Zarin Upset Ramona Singer Is More Popular With Fans!
Two boys and one closeted lesbian from the Laguna Beach High School Class of '04 disagree.
Lauren Conrad Insists She's 'Never Been The Sexy Girl'
Try taking time off from not eating.
EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW: Giuliana Rancic Taking Time Off From Trying For Baby
Two boys and one closeted lesbian from the Laguna Beach High School Class of '04 disagree.
Lauren Conrad Insists She's 'Never Been The Sexy Girl'
Try taking time off from not eating.
EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW: Giuliana Rancic Taking Time Off From Trying For Baby
Monday, April 11, 2011
Real Housewives of Orange County Episode 6 - "What a Difference a Year Makes"
Reality News
Rule #1 - After your foreclosure auction, set up separate "His & Hers" newspaper piles in the cardboard box.
'Real Housewives of Orange County's' Alexis and Jim Bellino share 6 of their many relationship rules
'Real Housewives of Orange County's' Alexis and Jim Bellino share 6 of their many relationship rules
Next up: "Jasmine Guy's Guys." It's a dating show.
Sinbad joins the club of celebrities with reality series
Pubes the cast left behind on the toilet seat can be yours for an extra $50 a month.
‘Jersey Shore’ house now for rent
Pubes the cast left behind on the toilet seat can be yours for an extra $50 a month.
‘Jersey Shore’ house now for rent
Read about the dating tribulations of a woman who might be legally retarded.
Harsh reality hurts Audrina's ex-lover Corey Bohan
Harsh reality hurts Audrina's ex-lover Corey Bohan
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Reality News
Dina Manzo lands a show about party planning on HGTV. She'll use a black and white color scheme for Joe Giudice's "Welcome Home from Jail" celebration.
'Housewife' Dina Manzo getting her own series
'Housewife' Dina Manzo getting her own series
Speaking of jail, Apollo Nida.
'Housewives' Star -- Mistakenly Handcuffed By Feds
Gay. Gay. Gay. Gay.
Jake Pavelka Runs Away From Ex Vienna Girardi
Important biographical information about a woman who spends all day taking hair off of vaginas.
Real Housewives of New York's Cindy Barshop: 5 Things to Know
Gay. Gay. Gay. Gay.
Jake Pavelka Runs Away From Ex Vienna Girardi
Important biographical information about a woman who spends all day taking hair off of vaginas.
Real Housewives of New York's Cindy Barshop: 5 Things to Know
Friday, April 8, 2011
Reality News
Someone with a shitty voice feels bad for someone with a good voice.
Jennifer Lopez Tells American Idol's Pia Toscano to 'Have Faith'
Jennifer Lopez Tells American Idol's Pia Toscano to 'Have Faith'
Audrina's mom gives other Embarrassing Drunk Moms of Reality Stars (ahem, Ronnie Magro-Ortiz) a run for their money.
Reality Family Feud! Audrina Patridge's Mom Calls Out the Kardashians!
He would do anything for love, including accusing someone of stealing his paint when it's really in a plastic bag in the corner.
Gary Busey on Meat Loaf's 'Apprentice' explosion: 'I don't know if this is real or put on'
Maybe the Redskins Cheerleaders will take her back.
Michaele Salahi: There Can't Be a Real Housewives of D.C. Without Me
He would do anything for love, including accusing someone of stealing his paint when it's really in a plastic bag in the corner.
Gary Busey on Meat Loaf's 'Apprentice' explosion: 'I don't know if this is real or put on'
Maybe the Redskins Cheerleaders will take her back.
Michaele Salahi: There Can't Be a Real Housewives of D.C. Without Me
Real Housewives of New York Episode 1 - "Grin and Bare It"
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Reality News
He's pursuing a career in entertainment? What the fuck is he going to do? Charge people to watch him get drunk and break picture frames?
Ology Exclusive: Interview With Adam Royer ('Real World Las Vegas')
Ology Exclusive: Interview With Adam Royer ('Real World Las Vegas')
Maybe they can straighten each others' hair post-coitus.
American Idol contestants Casey Abrams and Haley Reinhart enjoy an off-screen romance
What do Italy and Jenni "J-Woww" Farley have in common? No joke - I really want to know. She's, like, Irish or some shit.
Italy trip delayed for 'Jersey Shore' cast?
Casting call for fans of the "Poor Man's Anita Baker."
Does your entire family love Toni Braxton? Now Casting
What do Italy and Jenni "J-Woww" Farley have in common? No joke - I really want to know. She's, like, Irish or some shit.
Italy trip delayed for 'Jersey Shore' cast?
Casting call for fans of the "Poor Man's Anita Baker."
Does your entire family love Toni Braxton? Now Casting
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Reality News
Linda Richman 2.0 tells her side.
Jill Zarin: Why I decided to come back to 'Real Housewives of New York'
Jill Zarin: Why I decided to come back to 'Real Housewives of New York'
The first book will include a chapter called "Beef Curtains and You."
Lauren Conrad lands three-book deal with HarperCollins
Getting dumped by a man in a wig can make you do crazy things. Just ask Big Poppa.
Rock of Love Reality Trainwreck Faces the Music Over Booze Cruise
MTV will document the one group of people dumber than teens who think the pull-out method is reliable contraception.
MTV hooks up with 'Catfish'
Getting dumped by a man in a wig can make you do crazy things. Just ask Big Poppa.
Rock of Love Reality Trainwreck Faces the Music Over Booze Cruise
MTV will document the one group of people dumber than teens who think the pull-out method is reliable contraception.
MTV hooks up with 'Catfish'
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Reality News
What will she do at her 41st birthday party? Set the bartenders on fire? Unload a machine gun on her in-laws?
Bethenny Ever After Renewed for Third Season
Because treating your alcoholic sister like shit is a full-time job.
Because treating your alcoholic sister like shit is a full-time job.
'Real Housewives of Beverly Hills': Kyle Richards might be out.
The fat jokes write themselves.
Video: Kirstie Alley falls, recovers nicely on ‘Dancing with the Stars
If a chubby, balding, Ed Hardy-clad father of 8 can find a date, why not his ex-wife? Just kidding. She sucks.
Kate Gosselin dating?!
The fat jokes write themselves.
Video: Kirstie Alley falls, recovers nicely on ‘Dancing with the Stars
If a chubby, balding, Ed Hardy-clad father of 8 can find a date, why not his ex-wife? Just kidding. She sucks.
Kate Gosselin dating?!
Monday, April 4, 2011
Reality News
The talent portion will feature Kim G hugging the bottom of a pole with her ass crack showing.
EXCLUSIVE: Real Housewife Kim G Wants To Become Real Beauty Queen
So this should really just be called "Actor Wives". Because wrestling is fake. Get it?
So this should really just be called "Actor Wives". Because wrestling is fake. Get it?
Wrestling Wives Team Up For Reality Show
Let the "That Baby's Going to Be Really Tall" jokes commence.
Khloé Kardashian and Lamar Odom Want to Have a Baby..."Hopefully Soon"!
I feel sad for the paparazzi that have to work the Anderson, Indiana beat.
Picture This: Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley All Smiles
Let the "That Baby's Going to Be Really Tall" jokes commence.
Khloé Kardashian and Lamar Odom Want to Have a Baby..."Hopefully Soon"!
I feel sad for the paparazzi that have to work the Anderson, Indiana beat.
Picture This: Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley All Smiles
Real Housewives of Orange County Episode 5 - "No Hate"
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Reality News
Joe Giudice, looking extra "juicy and delicious" in his mug shot.
Emily Maynard has to invest in some skinny jeans and PBR if she's ever going to make it in Austin. An ironic mullet would really seal the deal.
'Bachelor' update: Emily Maynard is moving to Texas for Brad Womack
Lil' Jon would make a great running mate. He's got the public speaking enthusiasm to rival Howard Dean, and it's time someone in federal government had dreads.
Trump for President in 2012? Maybe. Trump for Trump? Without Question.
Snooki makes more money than Toni Morrison, Britney Spears makes more money than Placido Domingo, Wee Man makes more money than smart short people. That's the way of the world.
Sideshow: Snooki delivers $32,000 pearls of wisdom
Lil' Jon would make a great running mate. He's got the public speaking enthusiasm to rival Howard Dean, and it's time someone in federal government had dreads.
Trump for President in 2012? Maybe. Trump for Trump? Without Question.
Snooki makes more money than Toni Morrison, Britney Spears makes more money than Placido Domingo, Wee Man makes more money than smart short people. That's the way of the world.
Sideshow: Snooki delivers $32,000 pearls of wisdom
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Reality News
Dionne Warwick is an asshole. Was she always an asshole, or is she now just an asshole in an old-person way?
Dionne Warwick speaks up about 'Celebrity Apprentice': In tune or sour note?
But what about Dwight? WHAT ABOUT DWIGHT????
All six ‘Real Housewives of Atlanta’ set to be back for season four
Donn Gunvalson and Vicki Whatever-the-Fuck-Her-Last-Name-is-Now attempt to sell their fugly McMansion.
'O.C. Real Housewife' -- Buy, Buy House
So it's official - Tamra Barney and Eddie Judge are just beards for each other. That explains the whole "chugging wine to make sex bearable with someone of the opposite sex" thing.
Tamra gets naked with lesbian friend on 'Housewives'
Dionne Warwick speaks up about 'Celebrity Apprentice': In tune or sour note?
But what about Dwight? WHAT ABOUT DWIGHT????
All six ‘Real Housewives of Atlanta’ set to be back for season four
Donn Gunvalson and Vicki Whatever-the-Fuck-Her-Last-Name-is-Now attempt to sell their fugly McMansion.
'O.C. Real Housewife' -- Buy, Buy House
So it's official - Tamra Barney and Eddie Judge are just beards for each other. That explains the whole "chugging wine to make sex bearable with someone of the opposite sex" thing.
Tamra gets naked with lesbian friend on 'Housewives'
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Real Housewives of Orange County Episode 3 - "A New Lease on Life"
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Real Housewives of Miami Episode 4 - "Waterfront & Center"
Monday, March 14, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
The Real World Las Vegas Episode 1 - "Welcome to Las Vegas"
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Monday, March 7, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Kim & Kourtney Take New York Episode 6 - "Dream a Little Dream"
THE DREAM - Sing for me, baby. Show the world that you're famous for more than a massive vagina.
KIM KARDASHIAN - Ok, here goes nothing. Hope I can compare to the other singing Kim, Ms. Zolciak. **talking**
I'm going out tonight.THE DREAM - Yes! AMAZING!
And I'm gonna work like I'm paying my bills.
Real Housewives of Orange County Episode 1 - "Amped Blondes and Evil Eyes"
TAMRA BARNEY - Hey, girls. I'm so glad you could take time out of your busy pedicure schedules to try on ugly clothes with pictures on them at my boyfriend's house.
ALEXIS BELLINO - It's been difficult to find time for much of anything, now that one of my nannies was deported. I only went to Big Fat Juicy Booty Boot Camp twice this week.
FERNANDA - Your absence was definitely felt. By me. Because I'm a lesbian.
TAMRA BARNEY - Uh oh, I'm getting fake-lesbian jealous, Fernanda.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Jersey Shore Episode 23 - "A Cheesy Situation"
![]() |
Sammi might not be smart, or kind, or funny, but she sure knows how to wear black bras with outfits that display them. |
RONNIE - Wow, Sammi. You look really beautiful in that blue dress.
SAMMI - Thanks.
RONNIE - Mind if I follow you around the bar?
SAMMI - Yes. Yes, I do.
RONNIE - Well, then, fuck you and your visible black bra. Christ, haven't you ever heard of a convertible bandeau?
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Real Housewives of Miami Episode 2 - "Black Ball'd"
![]() |
Rich people with limp wrists eating food. |
CRISTY RICE - Hey, it's me, Cristy Rice, former wife of former Los Angeles Clippers star Glen Rice. I'm here to drink for free and make sure Joe Francis sees my butt.
LEA BLACK - Well, I'm here to raise money for the starving children of Hialeah.
ALEXIA ECHEVARRIA - Who probably read Venue magazine. Or wish they could.
LEA BLACK - And you, Miss Rice, have done those children a great disservice by not paying the $25 entrance free to this event.
Monday, February 28, 2011
The Bachelor Episode 9
On Chantal's date...
BRAD WOMACK - Wanna fuck on a piece of wood suspended above ferocious wildlife?
CHANTAL O. - Man. I should've been around for Mesnick's season. At least his fantasy dates included walls.
BRAD WOMACK - Chris Harrison would be very upset to hear you say that. He planned this.
CHANTAL - Really? I didn't realize he actually did stuff.
BRAD WOMACK - He doesn't. We just put his name on the card to make him feel included.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Kim & Kourtney Take New York Episode 7 - "Down and Out in New York City"
KIM KARDASHIAN - Shhhh! Did you hear that?
SHENGO - Sounds like a wallaby shagging an unwilling koala.
KIM KARDASHIAN - YES! That's exactly what it sounds like!
SHENGO - If there's one thing that sparks my auditory recognition, it's Australian animal rape.
KIM KARDASHIAN - You are an amazing human being.
![]() |
|
SHENGO - Sounds like a wallaby shagging an unwilling koala.
KIM KARDASHIAN - YES! That's exactly what it sounds like!
SHENGO - If there's one thing that sparks my auditory recognition, it's Australian animal rape.
KIM KARDASHIAN - You are an amazing human being.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Jersey Shore - "Kissing Cousins"
SNOOKI - Cabbie? I'm frightened. I haven't seen a strip mall or a Buffalo Wild Wings for twenty minutes.
DEENA - We're not going to the city, are we? I don't think I can handle another night in Newark.
CABBIE - That's what you people consider "the city"? Silly guidettes. We're going to New York.
SNOOKI & DEENA - NEW YORK CITY!?!?!
CABBIE - Pace Picante commercial impressions? So 1997. Grow up.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Real Housewives of Miami Episode 1 - "Paradise Cost"
![]() |
Cristy Rice is about two things - being an ex-wife to former NBA player Glen Rice, and wearin' lots of bracelets. |
LEA BLACK - Welcome to my airplane hangar. I'd like to treat you all to a lavish meal of lettuce and some other green vegetable.
MARYSOL PATTON - Avocados?
LARSA PIPPEN - Look at Career Girl over here, spouting off about vegetables.
ADRIANA DE MOURA - Oooh, somebody a little jealous?
LARSA PIPPEN - Jealous? Cleveland fans chant my husband's name at Lebron James to let him know he's second best. I don't get jealous.
Monday, February 21, 2011
The Bachelor Episode 9 - Hometown Dates
![]() |
Mr. Ashley H. will cut a bitch if he fucks with his daughter's dental dreams. |
In Seattle...
CHANTAL'S DAD - Hi, Brad. In case you couldn't tell from my massive house and hot wife, I'm rich. Here's a statue that suggests I'm a self-made man. You see, here in the United States, it's difficult for a white man to make something of himself.
BRAD WOMACK - Tell me about it.
CHANTAL'S DAD - Ok. Back in 1987, an eccentric Toyota baron took a chance on a mason's son with a crewcut. And that mason's son with a crewcut... was me.
CHANTAL'S MOM - **enters the room naked** Hi, I'm Chantal's mom. But just for fun, pretend I'm not.
BRAD WOMACK - Whoa.
CHANTAL O. - Really, mom? Again?
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Kim & Kourtney Take New York Episode 6 - "Diva Las Vegas"
![]() |
Kim's ass turns 30. |
SCOTT DISICK - I don't know if it's a good idea for me to be in Vegas...
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN - Why? We're just going to have dinner, take in some George Wallace, do keg stands, watch strippers do Ass-to-Ass, set fire to our room, and kill a toddler.
SCOTT DISICK - I can probably handle that.
KRIS JENNER - Promise you won't stuff a hundred dollar bill down a waiter's throat?
SCOTT DISICK - Promise. I don't carry hundreds anymore.
Friday, February 18, 2011
Jersey Shore Episode 21 - "The Great Depression"
![]() |
Are they still a Greek Chorus if they're Italian? |
DEENA - My bowels have hardened.
PAULY D - Assume a Jersey Turnpike stance. That ought to sufficiently loosen your stool.
DEENA - I've grown tired of "face down, ass up." It puts a strain on my glutes. And I've also grown tired of all of you.
THE SITUATION - Frankly, right now you're being a bit of a Slopopotamus. Or whatever.
DEENA - What an awful thing to say, Michael. Just awful.
RONNIE - Ignore him. Come sit with me on the veranda and watch me drunk-grill.
Monday, February 14, 2011
The Bachelor Episode 7
![]() |
Britt is smart, and Brad does not like that. |
BRAD WOMACK - Soooooo.... remember when I sent Alli home last week because she has little boobs and is boring?
BRITT - Sort of...
BRAD WOMACK - Yeah. That.
BRITT - So you're sending me home because I have little boobs and I'm boring? I'm a food writer! What could possibly be more interesting than that?
BRAD WOMACK - Big boobs.
BRITT - I see. Well, I guess I'll just swim back to the yacht...
BRAD WOMACK - Sorry, the yacht's reserved for me and that gummy old woman Shawntel and I met at the market.
BRITT - How am I supposed to get home?
BRAD WOMACK - Dunno. Peace. **swims back to the yacht**
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Kim & Kourtney Take New York Episode 3 - "Sexy in the City"
![]() |
Kim + Shengo = kangaroo babies. |
SHENGO - G'day, mate.
KIM KARDASHIAN - Oh, Shengo. You know I don't speak Portuguese.
SHENGO - Sorry. Hello, friend.
KIM KARDASHIAN - So much better. What's the plan for today?
SHENGO - Well, since I'm your bodyguard, I figured you'd make the plans and I'd follow you around to make sure no one kills you. Because that's what bodyguards do.
KIM KARDASHIAN - Hmmmm. What if we had sex in front of cameras instead?
SHENGO - Do I still get paid?
KIM KARDASHIAN - Of course.
SHENGO - Ok, then. **they start to do it**
SCOTT DISICK - **drives through the bedroom door in his new Phantom** Hey, I'm here with my boss Keith Frankel and his weird friend Gooch.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Jersey Shore Episode 20 - "Cabs are Here"
![]() |
"The Ballad of Sam & Ron" comes to a close. |
SAMMI - My bifocals. I can't believe you shattered my bifocals.
RONNIE - That's right. I destroyed those, and your reading light.
SAMMI - I'll never be able to finish Guns, Germs, and Steel: The Fates of Human Societies without my bifocals and reading light. **burps loudly** BRAAAAAAAP.
RONNIE - Not only did I intend to destroy your property, but I also planned to end your quest for knowledge. **rips Sammi's copy of Foucault's Discipline and Punish in half.**
SAMMI - Noooooo! Now I'll never know the secret of the Panopticon!!!!
THE SITUATION - Did somebody say "Panopticon"? **sees torn-up book **. What!? Who would do such a thing?
RONNIE - I did it. And I ought to shred your Wagner poster, too. Not only because you broke "bro code", but also because he's kind of an anti-Semite. C'mon, dude.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - Lost Footage
![]() |
A medium looks at a picture of Kim Richards and a murdered dude. bravotv.com |
At the Tony's reception...
CAMILLE GRAMMER - Finally. Here we are. You, me, and the Tonys. Time to rekindle that spark we had before I was diagnosed with Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
KELSEY GRAMMER - Hey, is that Rhea Perlman? I haven't seen her since Carla slipped on some peanut shells and broke her hip on Cheers. Rhe! Over here!
CAMILLE GRAMMER - That's not Rhea Perlman. That's a midget with a perm.
KELSEY GRAMMER - Dammit.
CAMILLE GRAMMER - Why don't we just talk? About... Us?
KELSEY GRAMMER - Talk? Hmmm. I guess we can give it a try.
CAMILLE GRAMMER - I miss you.
KELSEY GRAMMER - Thanks.
CAMILLE GRAMMER - I love you.
KELSEY GRAMMER - Ok, talk over! Hey, is that Bebe Neuwirth? Lillith! It's me, Frasier!
Monday, February 7, 2011
The Bachelor Episode 6
![]() |
Chantal O. is actually kind of an asshole. |
CHANTAL - We're in agreement about how much we hate Michelle, right?
SHAWNTEL - Of course, just like we're in agreement about everything. We have the same name, so we're, like, the same person.
CHANTAL - Don't ever compare yourself to me again, Claire Fisher.
SHAWNTEL - Is that a Six Feet Under reference? Cuz Claire didn't even work at the funeral home. She just lived there. She was an artist.
CHANTAL - Fuck off.
SHAWNTEL - I'm sorry. Please don't hate me, Alpha Female.
CHANTAL - Whatever. When that sun-damaged ho' Michelle shows up, I'm really going to give her the third degree about "giving Brad grief."
JACKIE - Who does she think she is, giving Brad grief?
BRIT - Giving Brad grief is really an awful thing.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)