Real Housewives of Miami: Season 2, Episode 1 - "A Tale of Two Miamis"

Napoleon loves drugs.

Real Housewives of Miami Episode 4 - "Waterfront & Center"

Sometimes you're just so in love that you have to get married this very second. Or, the groom's visa is about to expire.

Real Housewives of Miami Episode 3 - "Optical Delusion"

Adriana yells at an artist for being slow at art.

Real Housewives of Miami Episode 2 - "Black Ball'd"

Rich people with limp wrists eating food.

CRISTY RICE - Hey, it's me, Cristy Rice, former wife of former Los Angeles Clippers star Glen Rice. I'm here to drink for free and make sure Joe Francis sees my butt.

LEA BLACK - Well, I'm here to raise money for the starving children of Hialeah.

ALEXIA ECHEVARRIA - Who probably read Venue magazine. Or wish they could.

LEA BLACK - And you, Miss Rice, have done those children a great disservice by not paying the $25 entrance free to this event.

Real Housewives of Miami Episode 1 - "Paradise Cost"

Cristy Rice is about two things - being an ex-wife to former NBA player Glen Rice, and wearin' lots of bracelets.

LEA BLACK - Welcome to my airplane hangar. I'd like to treat you all to a lavish meal of lettuce and some other green vegetable.

MARYSOL PATTON - Avocados?

LARSA PIPPEN - Look at Career Girl over here, spouting off about vegetables.

ADRIANA DE MOURA - Oooh, somebody a little jealous?

LARSA PIPPEN - Jealous? Cleveland fans chant my husband's name at Lebron James to let him know he's second best. I don't get jealous.